|
Free Funny Pixs.com
|
free funny pictures | |
|
If you like FFpixs.com try babyanimalz.com! |
|
|
|
|
|
| Humor Information |Home | Funny Animals | Funny Art | Funny Cartoons | Crashes | Funny People | Political Humor | Funny Signs | Pass Out | |
|
|
Important Safety Tip$
I was given a list of Do's and Don'ts of interacting with people who have dementia. I've modified this list only slightly to guide you in safely interacting with corporate executives. Do--Hold their hand. [Most executives want to shake your hand when you enter their office. I have found that it is best to allow them to hold your hand as long as they see fit. Extended handholding is non-verbal communication of endearment.] Do--Keep your sense of humor. [Humor is critical with high-level corporate executives. Laugh at their cue, even if you aren't quite sure what you are laughing at. Otherwise, they have a tendency of feeling alienated and can turn hostile. Likewise, if you find yourself laughing and they are not, curtail laughing or like the contrary, they have a tendency of feeling alienated and can turn hostile.] Do--Keep things simple. [High-level executives are easily overwhelmed, which can generate a feeling of alienation, which can facilitate them turning hostile.] Do--Give them simple easy tasks or have them focus on entertainment such as television. [It is best to keep high-level executives busy with unimportant activities. Lack of activities has a tendency to make them feel "out-of-the-loop." This is dangerous. They will insert themselves into processes that were working fine without them. If possible, have a TV installed in their office and show them financial programs. They are easily distracted by dollar signs. Warning: dollar signs in red have been proven to generate hostility among high-level corporate executives.] Do--Remain calm. [These executives have an uncanny ability to sense nervousness, which puts them ill-at-ease, which can facilitate them turning hostile.] Don't--Give them choices. [High-level executives are easily overwhelmed, which can generate a feeling of alienation, which can facilitate them turning hostile. Instead, present evidence of a "great opportunity" and allow them come up with a grand idea for you to facilitate. Warning: this is inviting prolonged conversations with them about their grand idea.] Don'--Get irritated by them asking a question repeatedly. [Refer to keep your sense of humor above.] Don't--Tell them what they "should" do. [High-level executives are extremely sensitive to their autonomy and often automatically resist an underling or lesser "instructing" them, which can generate a feeling of alienation, which can facilitate them turning hostile to reinforce their sense of power.] Don't--Expect them to do what they say they are going to do. [Expectations are the root of disappointment. If you can curb your expectations, your frequency of disappointment will diminish.] Don't--Expect what they tell you to be accurate. [Treating what they say as accurate can only lead to actions based on fallacy and at the end of the day you will look foolish because they will "not recall" telling that "fact" to you.] Don't--Expect them to do what they say they will do. [See above. If this isn't self-apparent by now, stop reading this email and get back to work.] There were more on the list, which were equally appropriate. The only one that didn't seem to fit was: Do--Hug them. My experience is that hugs can make them feel ill-at-ease. By Howard Campbell
MORE RESOURCES:
Google News |
RELATED ARTICLES
When Humans and Dogs Collide: Negotiations for Todays Changing Times This morning I decided to find myself. I originally looked forward to the spiritual journey that would define who I was as a person. Essential Laughter Take time to laugh at yourself and the ridiculous in life. It is so refreshing to just laugh at your slips, peculiarities, forgetfulness, and fumbles. Got Originality? There are many ways to be original these days. But unfortunately I cannot reveal any of these ways because the followers would then not be original, would they? Now, I realize that somewhere between one to two people would have followed the advice I gave, but just in case my calculations were off - and it turns out three would have followed - I need to be careful about what I write ?One slogan which completely frustrates me due to its lack of originality is "got ____?" That's right - that lowercase phrase which was formerly synonymous with milk (and is now synonymous with everything) is so clich that it's even clich to write "got clich?" But the worst is not behind us. Valet Parking: Theft with Consent This column is long overdue. To put it in library terms, which I guess I already did (but I'd like to elaborate), this column is like checking out a book in 1998 but not returning it until yesterday. Wanted: Treadmill for an Elephant Maggie, the 22 year-old African elephant, has been a resident of the Alaska Zoo since 1983. The Zoo recently decided that Maggie needs nicer quarters, more attention, and a treadmill. Voodoo Munchies Looking for a lighthearted and fun way to remove the negative energy of a certain disruptive person from your life, or from your mind, if the person in question has moved on? Consider the cleansing (and giggle-inspiring) effect of Voodoo Munchies. Beginning now, whenever you need to deal with this person or the dirty bathtub ring of negative vibes they left in your head, bake a cake or a cookie (depending on your eating habits and kitchen skills) and decorate it with this person's name and or likeness. Slip-sliding On A Peel Every day, or at least every other day, we make a fruit smoothie at mid morning. Almost without fail, these smoothies contain bananas; so, we go through about 10 or 12 bananas a week. The Hidden Driveway I won't lie: there are a lot of things I want in life, and some of them I'd even pay for. Rather than listing them in some aimless order so that I can feel bad about not having these things, I will instead focus on one thing that is actually attainable: a hidden driveway. Setting History Straight Have you ever heard the name Will Schwenk? Or the name Artie Seymour? Probably not. But you will, you will, when the word gets around about how these two inglorious talents were by-passed, how they missed being touched by the magic wand of Fate. To See Or Not To See I went to the eye doctor the other day. I thought it was time to have my eyes checked. Restaurant Manager Gives Out Sexual Favors As Performance Bonus, Raise While many restaurant workers worry and sweat in anticipation of an imminent job-related performance review, employees at Applebee's in Westland have adopted an entirely different attitude toward the employment evaluation process. This is due in no small part to the fact that the general manager, Lisa Blanco, rewards superior employee performance the old fashion way. Very Precise Fortune Cookies I cracked open the fortune cookie and read the little slip of paper on the inside. Immediately I realized that it had been written by a weather forecaster. Cloning Advantage Super Families As the cloning debate of humankind continues we find ourselves in an interesting predicament. We see the need of self to extend past one's own lifetime as an innate characteristic; self-preservation has always been one of mankind's greatest drivers of motivation. Laughing Toward Truth: Six Tips for Lighthearted Thinkers Do you believe in the power of your convictions?It's time to lighten up.People love attaching themselves to ideas. How To Marry A Wealthy Guy How To Marry A Wealthy Guy(or Girl.. Finding Lost Children A couple of days ago I had to go to a dealership to get my car fixed. I am not implying that I don't want my car to have children, because who am I to make that choice? More so, I was sent a letter about a recall on one of the parts (the hazards, actually), meaning that the dealership was obligated to fix my car while I watched television and drank free coffee from a vending machine?"This is quite a deal," you may be thinking. Psychiatric Psychiatrist - A Joke on Psychiatry A few weeks ago I went to see a psychiatrist.We talked about how I was feeling. Coffee Tips (and the Elimination Thereof) I have recently become frustrated with something at doughnut establishments, and I'm not referring to the scones, although -- seriously -- just think about the writing possibilities if I were. Rather, it's the tip cup that bothers me. The Army Corp of Engineers Having Issues Fixing Breach The Army Corp of engineers is having a tough time filling in the breaches in the levees. They have tried to use giant sand bags to drop into the hole. Used Condom Found In Restaurant Salad Bar; Waiter Embarrassed To Tears Evidence of after-hours activity turned up at a Big Boy restaurant salad bar in Detroit last week, embarrassing not only the perpetrators, but nearly everyone associated with the company.Apparently, Mike Finney and Rhonda Carrion were working together to close down the restaurant's soup, salad and dessert bar and, with no one else around, culminated a night of flirting with sexual intercourse right on the bar. |
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |