|
Free Funny Pixs.com
|
free funny pictures | |
|
If you like FFpixs.com try babyanimalz.com! |
|
|
|
|
|
| Humor Information |Home | Funny Animals | Funny Art | Funny Cartoons | Crashes | Funny People | Political Humor | Funny Signs | Pass Out | |
|
|
How To Get Attention, or: As You Read This, You Feel an Irresistible Urge to Go On Reading!
We all want attention. As children we crave the attention of our parents. Later in life, we want to be seen and noticed by friends and family. And when running most any type of business, we must attract the attention of our potential customers. But how do you get somebody's undivided attention? When you were an infant, you got attention by screaming and crying. Then your parents knew you needed your diapers changed. As an adult, you can try using the same method to get noticed. Sure, you will get noticed - but in a negative way! On the Internet, every website that is selling something has the need to be attention-grabbing within seconds; to make the visitors read about their offer rather than just clicking away. Some are then tempted to use the infant method of getting attention: screaming and yelling. Popup-windows that pop up in your face and obscure the page text you're just trying to read, is one example. Flash-generated intro's that stop you in your tracks and say "Heeey, wait - before you read about our products I've got this f-a-n-t-a-s-t-i-c visual effect to show you...!" is another example of attention-grabbing contraptions that actually defeat their own purpose. They visually yell and scream at you, and draw your attention to the fact that you'd better spend your precious time somewhere else. Then there is the type of web page that plays some sound effect the moment you arrive. Either it is a piece of music (always just the kind you hate!) or a recorded sales pitch. Oh yes, then there is the Blinking Text... which blinks at frantic pace, just right to trigger an epileptic seizure. One of my websites is called "The Hosting Finder". Primarily, it offers some reviews of carefully selected web hosting companies. I am not selling anything on this website, and so I do not feel it would be appropriate to use a hard-selling jargon in my introductory headline. Right now, it reads: "Finding a Web Hosting Provider That Will Take Good Care of Your Precious WebPages ... Can Be Confusing" (I then explain how I researched the web to find good hosting services based on un-biased customer ratings rather than hype.) Recently, a marketing consultant offered to look at this website and give me some feedback at no cost. I accepted, and after checking my landing page he declared the headline to be "generic and bland". Instead, he suggested the following: "Want An Objective 'Client Feedback' Guide To Help You Find A 100% Trustworthy, Inexpensive, And Complete Web Hosting Service Provider (Based On Survey Results, Not Marketing Propaganda) -- With All The Options You Need To Run Your Web Site Smoothly And Successfully? Avoid The Hosting Nightmare Of Trying To Keep Your Site Live And Running Smoothly... Stop Wasting Time And Money In Costly Bad Service" In my reply, I thanked him for his trouble. I also pointed out that this flood of words might not be the optimal way of building confidence in my integrity as the provider of impartial reviews on web hosting. Maybe I am wrong, who knows. Perhaps I should start yelling and screaming just like everybody else? But I just don't like the idea of doing that. I'd rather hypnotize people into reading my texts. Some marketing gurus advocate this approach. Here are a few examples of how you're supposed to hypnotize people: 1. As you keep reading this ad copy, you are feeling more and more compelled to experience all the benefits of our product. 2. The more you understand just how valuable our product could be to your life, the less you think about delaying this important purchase. 3. After you read this short ad you will feel like your problems are almost completely solved, all you will have to do is order. Well, don't you feel compelled to reach for your wallet right now?! These examples are not intended as a joke; they are seriously trying to persuade people. And maybe they are, although I personally find them more amusing than hypnotizing. - I'll make a pause here; I just feel I have to go out and buy something! :-) OK, I am back. Time to finish this little essay on how to get attention. Oh, you have read this far? So I have managed to keep your attention then! I did it by ... no, I won't give my secret away. You'll have to read my Special Report, which I'm selling for ONLY $97. But hurry, this exclusive limited special offer is expiring, and will always expire, at midnight; whatever day you happen to read this! :-) Kai Virihaur is a researcher, web developer, and artist. He runs The Hosting Finder ( http://www.thehostingfinder.com ), a web hosting directoryfeaturing articles and RSS feeds on web development, website promotion, and online marketing. The article may be used freely as long as this resource box, with intact hyperlink, is included.
MORE RESOURCES:
Google News |
RELATED ARTICLES
Slip-sliding On A Peel Every day, or at least every other day, we make a fruit smoothie at mid morning. Almost without fail, these smoothies contain bananas; so, we go through about 10 or 12 bananas a week. Miss Cleo Was a Fake... NO - Really? YES Maaan! With her Jamaican accent Miss Cleo, a self proclaimed psychic and shaman would give you the answers to all life's mysteries.. Laughing Toward Truth: Six Tips for Lighthearted Thinkers Do you believe in the power of your convictions?It's time to lighten up.People love attaching themselves to ideas. New Orleans First to Experience Housing Bubble Burst Are we starting to see the Housing Bubble Burst in the wake of Hurricane Katrina? In New Orleans many homeowner's had their equity literally washed away. They are upside down in negative equity and basically underwater. How To Get Attention, or: As You Read This, You Feel an Irresistible Urge to Go On Reading! We all want attention. As children we crave the attention of our parents. When Humans and Dogs Collide: Negotiations for Todays Changing Times This morning I decided to find myself. I originally looked forward to the spiritual journey that would define who I was as a person. Lactose Intolerant? It could be a good thing Lactose Intolerant Individuals may prove a bonus in Space Missions. Lactose intolerant individuals have huge problems with gas from the inability to process certain dairy products and foods. Humans are like Monkeys Humans think much like monkeys and other primates, not much different in their abilities to reason. Why is this? We mimic, copy, imitate that which we see. Fried Green Tomatoes Recipe My next-door neighbors found a human bone in their backyard. Let me rephrase. Bed Bugs Bite I just turned on the news a minute ago and wondered why there weren't news flashes regarding when -- and perhaps where -- people are turning on the news. Sometimes it is a slow news week, and there's not much to read in Newsweek, so maybe this could take up some space. Used Condom Found In Restaurant Salad Bar; Waiter Embarrassed To Tears Evidence of after-hours activity turned up at a Big Boy restaurant salad bar in Detroit last week, embarrassing not only the perpetrators, but nearly everyone associated with the company.Apparently, Mike Finney and Rhonda Carrion were working together to close down the restaurant's soup, salad and dessert bar and, with no one else around, culminated a night of flirting with sexual intercourse right on the bar. Space, and the Room for It Space exploration came a long way since I was the size of a measurable amount of it.I remember with some pain, my first ride on a penny farthing with its big wheel and long spokes that were well engineered to cut a foot or two off anyone's legs. Playing Go-Between in the Digital Age NOTE: This article was originally published in May 2000 at *spark-online.com when my grandmother was alive. The Restaurant Chronicles, Part 1 Have you ever heard that saying, "The show must go on"? When you hear it, you think of what is commonly referred to as "Show-biz," don't you? But where can you go to see the best acting money can buy, any day of the week? No, I'm not talking about the theatre or TV. I'm talking about the "Restaurant-biz. Poor Rixs Almanac 8-27-05 Hey, Poor Rix: What do you think about school food? - Former StudentPoor Rix ate lunch at a school last week, and really liked it. Who knew they could make a dessert out of corn chips?Fact is, Poor Rix enjoyed everything about school, except for the "study" part. Coffee Tips (and the Elimination Thereof) I have recently become frustrated with something at doughnut establishments, and I'm not referring to the scones, although -- seriously -- just think about the writing possibilities if I were. Rather, it's the tip cup that bothers me. How to Build a Cobblestone House He huffed and he puffed and he blew the house down - certainly not if the house was built with cobblestones. Building cobblestone houses was a folk art that flourished in upstate New York from 1825 until the Civil War in 1860. Beyond Black and White Over visiting a neighbor the other day?"Would you like a cup of coffee?" he asks. "I just roasted the latest batch. Essential Laughter Take time to laugh at yourself and the ridiculous in life. It is so refreshing to just laugh at your slips, peculiarities, forgetfulness, and fumbles. Finding Lost Children A couple of days ago I had to go to a dealership to get my car fixed. I am not implying that I don't want my car to have children, because who am I to make that choice? More so, I was sent a letter about a recall on one of the parts (the hazards, actually), meaning that the dealership was obligated to fix my car while I watched television and drank free coffee from a vending machine?"This is quite a deal," you may be thinking. |
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |